I ordered my first
bottle of phereomone based products from love-scent a few years ago (back then YES, APC, Datemate, and Lure were the
rage - how far we've come!) and started using them. I later ordered the more potent products as they came to my
attention (PI, SOE, PF, AE, PPA. . .etc). I noticed some very subtle differences in the way women acted towards me -
it was hard to distinguish the effect one combination had over another - the most obvious effect I noticed was what
would happen when I put too much on. I was a very active member in the forums due to my chemistry backround as well
as the fact that I wanted to find a "meaningful relationship". However, I haven't been active in the forums over
the last 2 years although I continue to order Bruce's occasional specials and good deals if I happened to see them
when I visit love-scent.
I spent the last two years researching many of the methods of so called seduction
and spent much money reading every single word and listening to every single CD I could get my hands on. Each one of
these methods came with a money back guarentee stating that if the method wasn't 100% effective that I could return
it for a full refund. What I found is that most of these methods are inconsistant with one another - and that
consequently no one was really saying the same thing. Many of the time windows for returning these products was too
short to see if they were effective, and thus I would return the products before knowing full well if they worked or
not - but by the wording of the products guarentee, I was entitled to a full refund. Some products I ordered were
40% good advice and 60% nonsense. Some prodcuts were total garbage, yet seemed to work for other people. This
bothered me somewhat.
For the last 20 years, I had been trying to find a "meaningful relationship". Once I
stopped to think about what that meant, it actually means I am not trying to get my rocks off or having wild crazy
passionate for the moment sex for just a short period of time. Many of the people I know are very successful at
hooking up, why wasn't I? It was because I wanted something "meaningful" even though I had an instict to want to
get my rocks off. Consequently, this contradiction of stances was confusing me and thus making me somewhat
misdirected in my efforts. I started to look closely at the dynamics of how people related to each other and what
was going on at social settings. I had found that 2/3 of the people I encountered were actually only looking for
something fleeting and something meaningful never crossed their minds. This also meant that I was unlike most of the
people I encountered and thus if when we exchanged ideas that usually they were not the same.
Once I realized
that looking for something meaningful precludes wild passionate for the moment encounters, it suddenly dawned on me
that IF I COULD HAVE A MEANINGFUL CONVERSATION WITH A WOMAN AT A SOCIAL ENCOUNTER that it meant not looking for
something fleeting. It meant that I was trying to build something for the future - and consequently it means the
same thing to someone looking for a fleeting encounter who successfully hooks up for the night. It also means that I
AM NOT LOOKING FOR SOMETHING FLEETING. Once I believed this in my heart, mind, and soul, EVERYTHING CHANGED
DRAMATICALLY. I started realizing this 5 months ago and noticed things dramatically changing, but waited for a
reasonable amount of time before posting to the forum on the off chance everything was a fluke.
The knowledge
that in any new social encounter with a woman that there is NO CHANCE IN HELL THAT I AM GOING TO GET LAID but that I
am truly trying to build something towards a future took all the intimidation and uncertaintly out of my
intereactions. If I knew I was going to see her in the future at another setting, I would wait until the next
encounter. If I was fairly certain that I wouldn't run into her again, I ask her for her number and use it - to
meet her and build further relations. This also means that I am genuinely interested in getting to know her for who
she is and what she finds important. It also means that I do not ever do things such as bring up sex or any clever
innuendos. It also means that when I speak with her that I pay complete attention to her by looking right at her
face and never ever stare at her body or look around and check out other people. It also means that I do not put my
arms around her or try to touch her - if she wants to touch me - thats a different story - and that now happens very
often. It means that if she brings up sex - that I have struck paydirt.
All of a sudden, I find that women
are COMPETING FOR MY ATTENTION. They are calling me and seeking me out. They are becoming suddenly submissive and
they approach me in social settings and start talking - subtly knowing that I am not trying to "score" and thus they
feel comfortable. I keep the conversation upbeat and occasionally will tease the woman about something in herself. I
notice that when one of the women is talking to me that the others in the area start staring in my direction. It
also means that since so many women want to spend time with me (AND JUST TALK) that when one tries to make plans
with me that much of the time I am unavailable but will always suggest another day and time to meet. Things
progressed very rapidly and now I am in the throes of a wonderful relationship with someone who would not have given
me the time of day 6 months ago. Knowing that there are other women who want to spend time with me keeps me from
being the negative possessive man that all of us have been at one time or another. Her knowing this also means she
knows that if she pushes me too far that I can drop her in an instant and start building a future with someone else.
The quality of women who seem to be attracted to a guy that genuinely wants to get to know them without trying just
to get laid transends no boundries. It applies to women of different races, beauty, and builds. I did notice that
once the first drop-dead gorgeous woman started spending time with me, other pretty ones would step up to bat soon
after.
Six months ago, I had no one. No one called me and women used to interact to me with apprehension.
Little by little, things changed and the changes were so subtle that I barely noticed things changing. However, now
women are very open to me, they approach me and strike up conversations - they call me and try to spend time with me
- and they talk about me with each other. It's amazing to me.
Do the pheromones work? Although I have no
evidence to say that they do - my experience tells me yes. It makes the women more comfortable and open around me. I
tend to wear products containing mostly -nol.
However, the key was finally once and for all defining what I
really wanted and living my life from that standpoint. Once I started doing this, things progressed dramatically. It
also means that methods that try to get men laid as fast as possible were complete garbage to me whereas the ones
trying to build something for the future were more pertinant. However, no one method got it right and it was the
person inside me that actually was the key that finally opened the floodgates.
The long-term lesson for me
is that once I define what it is that I wanted and started to live my life consistant with that method, that I
FINALLY GOT WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR. I now have over dozen women who compete for my time and also the one special
woman I am currently involved with - this one is my number one - she is the one I spend my weekends with. Although
there are some physical and intimate things that go on in my relationship, this is not the focus - its all about
building towards a future with me (the future means at least 2 months up the road to me) - and this stance seems to
make me all the more sexually attractive to her - IT MAKES NO INTUITIVE SENSE TO ME. For some counterintuitive
reason, being involved with someone makes me more attractive to the other women - however, I will not act on it
unless my current relationship goes south.
It also leads me to believe that many of the techniques that are
floating about are all pertinant depending on what the reader themselves wants. One method encourages you to
initiate physical contact with a woman in an effort to seduce her - this will not work for my goal - but it may work
if you just want something fleeting. One method encourages you to wait over a week before you call a women - this
works for me but will not work for someone looking for a quick fix. Many methods encourage men to stop acting like
wussies and wimps - this is good advice if you want the kind of woman this attracts - but not if you are looking for
someone unpredictable and prone to drama. Some of us live for extreme emotions and some of us avoid them. The
important thing is to once and for all determine what it is YOU REALLY WANT and then start living your life from
that standpoint (maybe I'm generalizing too much here - but it worked for me).
Once I realized that all I
wanted from an initial encounter from a woman was a good conversation and a hope for something in the future -
everything opened up and here I am now.
I wish I figured this all out 20 years ago. It had been staring me in
the face all along. I first realized I wanted a "meaningful relationship" when I was 16. Why the hell did it take me
over 20 years to finally sit down and figure out what I was saying to myself? Better late than never.
