Still no success

[tenaciousBLADE]

Personally, I disagree

with Fabulous' opinion on 99% of men cheating. I might be only 23 years old and I might have missed some "facts" of

life - but for now that sure ain't any fact in my life.

With that said, she does have a point

here:

I haven’t cursed or said

anything rude or belligerent so you shouldn’t call my advice “bad” you should just say you don’t agree. As I do not

agree with everything you or anybody else says on here but I won’t say its “bad” I would just say I don’t agree.


Thank

You!

I recon it was probably only a misunderstanding and they probably only

ment they disagree. And yes, I agree with Lokua that you shoudn't use words as "facts" to describe your opinion (if

you see them as facts in your personal life it's one thing, but these are not viewed as fact by any measurable

manner that I know of).

Still, calling any of our opinions bad advice and not even stating it is your

personal opinion that it's bad advice - is a bit harsh. Even if you're right, and that advice is not by

any means usefull to the poster - you shouldn't label it as "bad".

But hey... everyone makes mistakes. In these

forums, I guess most of what is said is opinion anyway.

[justfabulous]

...............

[sweet thing]

I say you should go about your business and let him wonder why you are not lamenting.



Everyday you should dress as though you care about your appearance. Spend time enjoying your looks in the

mirror and pay him no mind. Dump the sweats, flip flops and find that red lipstick. That is how women that are

having an affair act. Do not ask, "Does this dress make me look fat?" Just put it on with your FMPs and keep on

going. You know the routine. Kiss him on the forehead like a little school boy and then check to make sure your

seams are on straight. "What is she up to?"

The attention you will get from men on the outside of your

home will fuel sexual energy in the inside of it. He will notice other men looking at you, and wonder why he is not

jumping on it too.

Either way, do not beat yourself up for his lack of sexual interest. It may be a medical

reason, perhaps a side effect of a perscription medication. Who knows. There are plenty of environmental factors for

low sex drive. Stress is number one!

Just keep your head up and your self esteem. Love yourself.



Shake it till you break it. If he won't make it, there are plenty of men that will take it.

Sweet Thing

[idesign]

Hi Fabulous,

I really

don't want you to get disillusioned by men. There is no possible way to scientifically know who cheats and who

doesn't. By its very nature cheating hides statistics.

But since we're basing this on personal observation,

the older I get the more I see couples my age (49) being faithful, and the incidence of cheating being spread pretty

much equally among men and women.

You and I have talked here about the kind of man you're looking for, and his

qualities. In my search I'm looking for a woman who has the character traits of someone I know will be faithful.

There are no guarantees, but there ARE those character traits in any person that you can read which will lead you to

trust or distrust.

I, like Bel, believe in the possibility of honesty and commitment among men and women. It can

happen, and does happen. To me there is no more important trait in any woman I would choose to spend my life

with.

[Lokua]

Lokua "3 out of 10 men cheat?" Where in the heck

did you get that from?

dunno, same place you pulled your guess from? ^.^

its hard

to guess such things considering its impossible to get stasticial measurements on such things. not many would admit

to such questioning thus you cannot have an accurate measurement

however you really shouldnt judge all based upon

your experiences.

the only study i could find is 10yrs old though it places the estimate around 22% for men and

18% for women cheating. 4% is not a huge diffrence and does imply women cheat just as much as men

do..

source:
http://www.womansavers.com/infidelity-statistics.asp

[rllycute]

OMG - I

didn't know I would get such a large reply. to answer some of the questions.... I am 43 and he is 38. I work M-F

and he works M-Th during the day and then works F-Sat nights from 4pm to 5am. so most of our problem is that he is

drop dead tired all the time. on his days off he likes to lay around and play video games and not have to think

about anything. I know for sure he is not cheating because I can call him at any time day or night - and no - not

at just certain times and I can get him right away. He will talk to me for 15 to 30 mins when I call. If I don't

call him for a while he calls and checks on me. we are trying to keep our communication alive. I have told him

that I enjoy sex with him and that i desire him. We have had moments where i have tried to start something and he

blows me off because he is too tired and says its not fair because he wants to but wouldn't be able to give it his

all. It hurts but I understand. I just wanted to try mones to see if I can waken things up for us on the days he

is off and resting. It doesn't work. I've even worn it out to see if what people say is true - it draws others

to you. I get nothing - not even a glance. I ordered something else a few weeks ago and still nothing. so i

don't think it's just him. no guy looks my way - dont misunderstand me - i dont want any other man - i just

wanted to see if this stuff works. if others look then maybe its us - but no one has so maybe it doesnt work on me

specifically. I have been cheated on before a few times and i totally know the signs. if i thought that were the

case - i respect myself enough to say 'you're gone!' he is a good man, great provider and wonderful dad of a 13

yr old that has issues. and sex isnt the most important in a relationship. i just miss him so much in that area.

i just want something that will wake him up and put spice in the night - just one night. anything would be great -

even a make out session at this point. but i guess his being tired from work is just in the way - heck he's so

tired he's not even working out anymore and has gain 25 pounds.
any more suggestions????

[belgareth]

You didn't mention the other

symptoms. Now it is begining to sound like depression, especially the weight gain to go with a general lack of

interest in other things. I'm not a psychologist but I think that you should explore the possibility of depression

with him. Do you have a family doctor you can discuss it with youself?